Aloha 2013!

2012 was probably THE hardest year of my life. I am prepared to wrap it up and move on. My guardian angel will be watching over me as I achieve big things this year. Although she will not be here to watch me get married, or have kids, or do big kid things..I know she's watching me and has the best view from heaven. I will strive to live my life to the fullest and leave a legacy like hers behind. She showed everyone that no matter how much you do, you can always do more. Life is about giving. Life should be selfless. I will open my heart more to others. I will live for my mom. I will make 2013 better than 2012. Happy new year's everyone. xoxo

It's been almost 4 months since I've blogged. I just have no idea how to put into words the emptiness, pain, and sorrow that I've been feeling. I have been dreading Christmas for months and now that it's here..the sadness of missing my mom is kicking in full gear. Oh how I wish she was here this year. But this post wasn't to mope or to complain..we had our family christmas party a little early this year. Seeing all of my baby cousins and family enjoying each other's presence just felt like it did every year. It was as though she never left. Her warmth was still holding us all together, and for that I am thankful. I am praying and keeping the families of the victims from the Connecticut shooting close to my heart. I feel their pain and my heart breaks a million times for them. Merry Christmas to all, hold your family close and love one another. Until next time..

First post, First step on the way to picking up the pieces.

"You never know how strong you are until that is your only option."

     This quote has been my mantra for the last few months. I tragically lost my loving mother in April after her unsuccessful but trying fight against her asthma. She lead a life of positivity and nothing but goodness. She gave everything she had to everyone she loved. She never held back for anything. My mother was one of a few people who would think twice about someone else before thinking once about herself. As I type this, I do it with a smile. As much as the pain of missing her is stabbing me repeatedly and painfully in my heart, I am twice as proud to be able to call this hero my Mom.
     Death is such a terrible thing to have to deal with, especially when it is someone you love unconditionally. I have been trying to keep my faith high and trust in God for his decision to bring his angel home so early. Before my mom's passing, I never really felt the heartbreak of losing a loved one. Now, my heart breaks for everyone who lost someone. I commend each of those people for their courageous ways to be able to move on with their lives.
     I know this pain will never go away, but I hope that one day it will be somewhat bearable. I miss you so much mom, more than you will ever know. I hope you're flying high with the best of the best of angels. Actually, I know so. We were lucky to have you in our lives for this long, and everyone in heaven is ten times as lucky to have you know. Love you Mom.